In the words of Timbaland: "It's been a long; I shouldn't left you without a dope beat to step to!" HAHA!
But, praise JESUS anyhow, Ladies! In April 2017 I saw an Instagram post that asked MEN ONLY to comment with "Relationship Advice" for women. In random order, I wrote down FIFTY THREE of the 195 male responses. If there are duplicates, that's to show the urgency and need for that topic that men have. Some of the suggestions may be a little risque, and that's okay, but hear the sentiment behind them. I hope that you can use at least a few of them to help you draw even closer to your husband, because some of our would never vocalize these desires. Either because they don't want to hurt us, and/or they don't feel safe enough with us to do so. Think about that. How can you make your man feel safer and more secure with you. Let's read on...
1) Learn how to cook.
2) Keep your feet and nails done.
3) Do not assume. Make sure it is a proven to be true before you raise hell about it.
4) Don't be loud.
5) Go natural. Eat organic. Love yourself. You are your first relationship.
7) Don't be a feminist.
8) Any movement that tells you to focus on you only and don't teach you to build WITH your man is more destructive than helpful to you.
9) Grow with your partner.
10) Let me see you without that waist trainer. I wanna love the real you and all of you.
11) Stop letting the government distract you with snapchat filters and pick up and read a f------book.
13) Don't try and change him.
14) Don't always assume the worst.
15) Cater to your man's ego. Compliment and affirm him regularly and build him up. Don't add to his stress by complaining so much. Instead, focus on what he does well and encourage him in the areas where he's striving to do better Be his friend and his most vocal cheerleader. Be humble and unselfish.
16) Learn to talk to your man and hear his heart.
17) Love fiercely.
18) Lose weight, lose the weaves, lose the attitudes and stop having kids out of wedlock.
19) Go natural. Drop the weave.
20) Don't make joking, ignorant comments. There is a way to say everything; the extra is unnecessary and not cute.
21) VERBALLY tell us what you want, what is wrong. We don't speak "mood swing". Nurture us like our mother would. Don't get satisfied and content just because you got the ring. Keep things interesting and exciting.
22) I suggest finding a mentor that lives a certain standard that you desire for your lifestyle, family, fitness, fun, nutrition, finances, relationships, etc.
23) Random blow-jobs and words of encouragement goes a long way. Also don't be too knit-picky.
24) Listen more. Everything else will follow.
25) Whatever principles and standards are precious to you, keep them. They should not be compromised for his accommodation.
26) Some days you gotta fight through your tiredness and surrender yourselves to your kings, physically.
27) Never settle.
28) Don't compare your man to these other dudes on social media, and understand that what works for you and your man works for y'all. You don't have to have a relationship that's identical to anyone else's.
29) Love your man no matter what happens. Be one with him in bad days and in good days. Have a good spiritual/emotional contact with your man.
30) Men need three things: love, support, understanding.
31) Demeaning a man and attempting to tear him down doesn't make you a strong woman. It simply makes you a disrespectful one. Be kind to your man.
32) Stop being so hood and ratchet and be a lady.
33) Speak life to that man. Something about an encouraging woman that will make a man go out and conquer the world.
34) If he's wrong, educate him in love. Don't belittle him.
35) Remain loyal.
36) Stop nagging.
37) Stop babying them.
38) Keep putting the pressure on these weak n----. There is no time to baby any man and try to comfort his weak emotions. Don't make sex easy. Pick a n---- brain before you even think of letting him enter your heavenly portable gates on earth. But keep the kitty tight and active. You are NOT a house mouse. Don't be in his face all the time. If he can't respect you (your mind, soul, and body) leave him. If he lay his hands on you, SHOOT him.
39) Marry men that are at least 7 years older than you.
40) Watch your mouth. Humble yourselves. Take heed.
41) Test him on his words with action behind him. Don't let him sell you a dream.
42) Practice building strong lines of communication no matter what the subject.
43) Don't listen to anything the world tells you before you have thorough introspection or at least reflect on the way you process thoughts and how they influence how you interact.
44) Be the polar opposite of a feminist.
45) Stop being available.
46) Agree to disagree and never go to bed or leave the house mad.
47) Administer your power and authority through love and affection. Can't solve a man's problem on the same plane a man operates.
48) Demand respect.
49) Don't make it about you; make it about both of you.
50) Don't look at where he is right now, but see his potential.
51) If you feel that he's not right for you, leave.
52) Don't try to make him (the wrong person) be your Prince Charming.
53) Give love back.
I don't know about you, but I certainly needed to be reminded by a few of those today (thank You Lord)! And for those of you in (good-standing) relationships, ask your man what his advice is, then comment so that we all can be enriched. And men, you are invited to freely add to this list if you don't already see a comment that reflects your heart and thinking as well. Let's sharpen each other and build HEALTHY relationships!
Be SO encouraged today.